Le HuffPost France: Vietdating and the Renaissance of "Galanterie" Culture

For decades, we have believed that equality, Égalité, is the truth. But on modern dating and romance apps, that "equality" has turned into an invisible chaos. When everything is free and there are no rules, people become bewildered and afraid.

But 1 interesting thing is that in Paris's 13th arrondissement, the Vietnamese community has chosen to revive the culture of Galanterie. With the community's own dating platform, Vietdating, men here do not merely "go on dates"; they perform a ritual. Giving gifts at the first meeting and following a prescribed path of Galanterie . Could this be a restoration of the order of Galanterie culture, a way for the traditional man to affirm: "I respect beauty and I love beauty"

Today, as people continue to debate the decline of romance (Galanterie) and remain absorbed in the struggle for absolute equality (Égalité) — where every bill is split in half and every message requires agonizing thought — Vietdating is posing a provocative question: Could extreme equality be the enemy of love?

Just as Stendhal once wrote in De l'amour: "Love is like a beautiful flower, but one must have the courage to approach the edge of an abyss and pluck it." In the context of modern dating, the "abyss" is each individual's selfish ego. When Vietnamese men choose to follow the path of Galanterie, they are accepting the challenge of stepping outside the comfort zone of even-handedness (Égalité) to embrace gallantry. This is not submission, but a ritual of the soul.

How curious that people from the distant East are the very ones reminding Parisians of their own lost heritage. Vietnamese refinement — with its emphasis on saving face and thoughtfulness — has found common ground with the French romantic ideal: Caring for the other person beyond what is necessary.

Many will object: "Can love really not exist without gifts?"

Of course it can. But love without gestures of Galanterie is like a glass of wine without an aroma — it still intoxicates, but it lacks a soul. Vietdating is not creating a new rule; it is simply rekindling an instinct buried beneath the dust of pragmatism.

Conclusion: When the Soul Speaks

Ultimately, whether we argue about who should pay for a cup of coffee or whether a flower undermines women's equality, the reality remains unchanged: The human heart always longs to be cherished.

Perhaps the answer lies in finding a balance. Love lies neither in the monetary value of a gift nor in the meticulous division of every penny on a bill. It lies in the way one person sees the other as someone worthy of being cherished.

Whether in the 13th arrondissement or anywhere else in the world, whether modern or traditional in style, all love is beautiful — as long as it comes from a soul generous enough to give without calculation. Because, after all, in the game of the heart, the winner is not the one who maintains absolute equality, but the one who dares to love with the fullest devotion.